Learn to Love by Being Generous

In Philippians 4:18 I read, “I am generously supplied with the gifts you sent me . . . They are a sweet-smelling sacrifice that is acceptable and pleasing to God.” (NLT)

Life is not about things. It’s about learning how to love.

One of the best ways to learn to love is through generosity—giving my time, money, effort, and energy. When I’m generous, I’m affirming that God and people matter most to me. In other words, what matters most is love.

Every time I give—whether that’s giving my time, money, effort, or energy—I reveal what matters to me. 

Does my schedule reveal that my career matters most to me? Does my bank statement show that my hobby is most important? Or does how I spend my money and time show that loving God and people matters most to me?

If at the end of life I’ve acquired a giant pile of things but I’m estranged from my family and friends, I’ve missed the point! I’ve missed the opportunity to love through my generosity.

But when I spend my life building generously into people and relationships, I’m living in the light of heaven. I’m living in love.

Think about the people I’m most grateful for from my own life. Most of those are probably people who have invested time, money, effort, or energy in me.

Paul gives an example of this: “You have done well to share with me in my present difficulty. As you know, you Philippians were the only ones who gave me financial help when I first brought you the Good News . . . No other church did this . . . At the moment I have all I need—and more! I am generously supplied with the gifts you sent me . . . They are a sweet-smelling sacrifice that is acceptable and pleasing to God” (Philippians 4:14-15, 18 NLT).

The people Paul was writing to had learned this truth: I earn a living by what I make, but I earn the respect and gratitude of others by what I give out of a loving heart.

Take some time today to reflect on the people who’ve been generous to me. Then use them as a model for how I can be generous to others.

In summary, life is not about things. It’s about learning how to love. One of the best ways to learn to love is through generosity—giving my time, money, effort, and energy. When I’m generous, I’m affirming that God and people matter most to me. Every time I give—whether that’s giving my time, money, effort, or energy—I reveal what matters to me.  Does my schedule reveal that my career matters most to me? Does my bank statement show that my hobby is most important? Or does how I spend my money and time show that loving God and people matters most to me? If at the end I’ve acquired a giant pile of things but I’m estranged from my family and friends, I’ve missed the point! I’ve missed the opportunity to love through my generosity. But when I spend my life building generously into people and relationships, I’m living in love. I earn a living by what I make, but I earn the respect and gratitude of others by what I give out of a loving heart. Take some time today to reflect on the people who’ve been generous to me. Then use them as a model for how I can be generous to others.

I have all I need, not all I want. God takes care of me and will supply all my needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to me in Christ Jesus. I can trust that God will always meet my needs. There is a difference between my wants and my needs. I may not always get what I want. But when I trust in Christ, he will help adjust my perception, my attitude and my appetite. I begin to accept his provision and his power to live for him and his purposes for my life. I have no need to worry, life is more than just the accumulation of things. He has assumed responsibility for all of my needs. If I find myself worrying, then it's because I'm assuming responsibility for something that God has said he will take care of. God knows what's going on in my life. He knows all my needs, even before I ask. He wants to help me out. 

Strong Marriages Are Good for Everyone

In Romans 12:9-10 I read, “Love sincerely . . . Hold on to what is good. Be devoted to each other like a loving family. Excel in showing respect for each other.” (GW)

Strong marriages are good for everyone. They benefit the individuals who are part of those relationships and can even help to strengthen whole societies.

Throughout history, marriage has been the fundamental building block of every society and culture. When marriages have been strong, nations have been strong. When marriages and families weaken, cultures decline.

Strong marriages benefit the individuals in the relationship too. God uses marriage to perfect my character. In relationships I learn to be unselfish and loving. If I get married, no relationship will have a greater impact on my life.

If not married, God can and will use other people to build character. Single people don’t get off the hook! Godly others-focused singles play a critical role in flourishing cultures as well. In fact, sometimes, they play roles that married couples and those with children can’t. The truth is, societies also need singles to live in strong, fearless relationships with others.

One of the main purposes of life is to grow up and realize it’s not all about me. In fact, real happiness comes from giving my life away, being unselfish, serving, and loving. This is called maturity.

Life is a laboratory of learning how to love. It’s the most important thing in life because God is love, and he wants me to become like him. He wants to make me like Jesus Christ. He wants to build my character.

If married, the number one tool that God uses in my life to build Christ-like character is my spouse. Every day I get hundreds of opportunities to think about the other person instead of myself.

The Bible says, “Love sincerely . . . Hold on to what is good. Be devoted to each other like a loving family. Excel in showing respect for each other” (Romans 12:9-10 GW).

Am I doing this in my marriage? Love washes the dishes, takes out the garbage and puts the other person first.

Excel in showing respect for each other so that I grow to be more like Christ. It will lead to a stronger relationship for myself and a stronger society for everyone.

In summary, strong marriages are good for everyone. They benefit the individuals who are part of those relationships and can even help to strengthen whole societies. Marriage has been the fundamental building block of every society and culture. When marriages have been strong, nations have been strong. When marriages and families weaken, cultures decline. Strong marriages benefit the individuals in the relationship too. God uses marriage to perfect my character. I learn to be unselfish and loving. If I get married, no relationship will have a greater impact on my life. If not married, God can and will use other people to build character. Godly others-focused singles also play a critical role in flourishing cultures as well. Sometimes they play roles that married couples and those with children can’t. As such societies also need singles to live in strong, fearless relationships with others. One of the main purposes of life is to grow up and realize it’s not all about me. Real happiness comes from giving my life away, being unselfish, serving, and loving. This is called maturity. Life is a laboratory of learning how to love. It’s the most important thing in life because God is love, and he wants me to become like him. He wants to make me like Jesus Christ. He wants to build my character. If married, the number one tool that God uses in my life to build Christ-like character is my spouse. Every day I get hundreds of opportunities to think about the other person instead of myself. So we should excel in showing respect for each other so that we can grow to be more like Christ. It will lead to a stronger relationship and a stronger society for everyone.

Most of us have learned how to be courteous to others, how to speak kindly, avoid hurting their feelings, and appear to take an interest in them. We may even be skilled in pretending to feel compassion when we hear of others' needs, or to become indignant when we learn of injustice. But God calls us to genuine love that goes far beyond pretense and politeness. Genuine love requires concentration and effort. It means helping others become better people. It demands our time, money, and personal involvement. No individual has the capacity to express love to a whole community, but the body of Christ in your town does.  Look for people who need my love, and look for ways you and your fellow believers can love your community for Christ.  We can honor others in one of two ways. One involves ulterior motives. We honor our bosses so they will reward us, our employees so they will work harder, the wealthy so they will contribute to our cause, the powerful so they will use their power for us and not against us. God's way involves love. As Christians, we honor people because they have been created in God's image, because they are our brothers and sisters in Christ, and because they have a unique contribution to make to Christ's church. Does God's way of honoring others sound too difficult for your competitive nature? Why not try to outdo one another in showing honor? Put others first. 

Marriage Is Meant for Connection

In 1 Corinthians 11:11 I read, “In God’s plan men and women need each other.” (TLB)

Marriage doesn’t solve or create my problems. Marriage reveals them. It simply magnifies what was already a problem when I was living as a single adult.

So if marriage doesn’t solve my problems, what does marriage do? Why did God design marriage in the first place?

God created marriage for the connection of men and women.

The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 11:11, “In God’s plan men and women need each other” (TLB).

Whether or not I get married, I need someone of the opposite sex in my life. Why? Because nobody holds the full image of God. Women get part of it and men get part of it, and we need each other. God wired us this way. God thought up gender, sex, and marriage. What a God!

Did you ever wonder why God made man first and then woman a little bit later? Why didn’t he make them both at the same time?

I think he did it for Adam’s benefit. I think he wanted Adam to realize how much he needed women in his life.

Genesis 2:18 says, “It isn’t good for man to be alone; I will make a companion for him” (TLB).

I need companions in all different areas of your life. But marriage is a particularly significant way to provide companionship; it’s in a relational class all by itself.

Here’s what Jesus had to say about it: “‘God made them male and female’ from the beginning of creation. ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together” (Mark 10:6-9 NLT).

This passage makes three major points about marriage:

1. Marriage is God’s plan. It’s not a tradition that can just be thrown out.

2. Marriage is between a man and a woman. Their body parts fit together for a purpose—the creation of everybody else.

3. Marriage is designed to be permanent. That doesn’t always happen. God is always ready and willing to forgive when I don’t live up to his standards. But marriage is meant to be for life.

Those are radical statements. Even if many people don’t believe them, they’re still the truth!

The reality of life today is that many people live outside of this marriage ideal. But just because we live in the real, not necessarily the ideal, doesn’t mean we get to say the ideal doesn’t exist.

The ideal is still the way God designed marriage. And when I choose to live inside of that design, I’ll reap the benefits of connection that God intended marriage to provide.

In summary, marriage doesn’t solve or create my problems. Marriage reveals them. It simply magnifies what was already a problem when I was living as a single adult. So, if marriage doesn’t solve my problems, what does marriage do? God created marriage for the connection of men and women. In God’s plan men and women need each other. Whether or not I get married, I need someone of the opposite sex in my life. Because nobody holds the full image of God. We need each other. God wired us this way. God himself said “It isn’t good for man to be alone; I will make a companion for him”. I need companions in all different areas of my life. Marriage is a particularly significant way to provide companionship. God made us male and female from the beginning of creation. This is why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined”. This passage makes three major points about marriage: First, marriage is God’s plan. It’s not a tradition that can just be thrown out. Secondly, marriage is between a man and a woman. Their body parts fit together for a purpose—the creation of everybody else. Lastly, marriage is designed to be permanent. That doesn’t always happen. God is always ready and willing to forgive when I don’t live up to his standards. But marriage is meant to be for life. Even if many people don’t believe it, it’s still the truth! Many people live outside of this marriage ideal. But just because we live in the real, not necessarily the ideal, doesn’t mean we get to say the ideal doesn’t exist. The ideal is still the way God designed marriage. And when I choose to live inside of that design, I’ll reap the benefits of connection that God intended marriage to provide.

God created lines of authority in order for his created world to function smoothly. Although there must be lines of authority, even in marriage, there should not be lines of superiority. God created men and women with unique and complementary characteristics. One sex is not better than the other. We must not let the issue of authority and submission become a wedge to destroy oneness in marriage. Instead, we should use our unique gifts to strengthen our marriages and to glorify God.