When My Heart Changes, My Talk Changes

In James 3:5-6 I read, “It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell.” (The Message)

As God transforms my heart, the way I talk to others will begin to change. And that will bring more harmony to my relationships. Why? Because, in any relationship, most conflict is caused by the words I say and how I say them.

“It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell” (James 3:5-6 The Message).

People respond differently to stress and pressure. When the pressure is on, what comes out in someone’s speech reveals what’s really going on in their heart.

Under stress, kind people become kinder and patient people become more patient. Under stress, mean people become meaner, bullies become bigger bullies, angry people become angrier, and opinionated people become more opinionated.

Whatever is in my heart is going to spill out when I’m under pressure. So the only way I can control what I say is to manage what’s going on in my heart. How do I really feel about the people I interact with each day? Does social, economic, or political standing have any effect on how I see them? Do I give equal respect to everyone I meet?

Humility means thinking of myself less and thinking more about the needs of others. It means I meet people on their own terms; I don’t think I know it all. When I practice humility, I start seeing people as God created them: in his image, with great worth.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (NIV).

Imagine what would happen if I constantly see people as God sees them. I would become known for being humble and kind and a great listener. I would have a lot more harmony in my relationships. And I would show the world more of what Jesus is like!

In summary, As God transforms my heart, the way I talk to others will begin to change. And that will bring more harmony to my relationships. Most conflict is caused by the words I say and how I say them. It only takes a spark to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word can do that. When the pressure is on, what comes out in someone’s speech reveals what’s really going on in their heart. Under stress, kind people become kinder and patient people become more patient. Under stress, mean people become meaner, bullies become bigger bullies, angry people become angrier, and opinionated people become more opinionated. Whatever is in my heart is going to spill out when I’m under pressure. So the only way I can control what I say is to manage what’s going on in my heart. How do I really feel about the people I interact with. Do I give equal respect to everyone I meet? Humility means thinking of myself less and thinking more about the needs of others. I meet people on their own terms; I don’t think I know it all. When I practice humility, I start seeing people as God created them: in his image, with great worth. I shouldn’t let any unwholesome talk come out of my mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, so that it may benefit those who listen. I need to learn to see people as God sees them. I would become known for being humble and kind and a great listener. I would have a lot more harmony in my relationships. And I would show the world more of what Jesus is like!

What I say and don't say are both important. I must not only say the right words at the right time, but also control my desire to say what I shouldn't. Before I speak, ask, "Is what I want to say true, necessary or kind? My uncontrolled tongue can do terrible damage. Idle and hateful words are damaging because they spread destruction quickly, and no one can stop the results once they are spoken. So don't be careless with what I say, thinking I can apologize later, because even if I do, the scars remain. Words can be like fire, I can neither control nor reverse the damage they can do.