As I look at Psalm 139:23-24, I see, “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” (NIV)
In this passage, David asks God to search for sin and point it out, even to the level of testing his thoughts. Likewise, how am I to recognize sin unless I let God point it out. Then, when God shows me, I can repent of it and be forgiven. If I ask the Lord to search my heart and thoughts and reveal my sin, I will be continuing "along the path of everlasting life."
One of the best strategies for de-escalating conflict is also one of the scariest things I can do: Asking God to give me a clear picture of myself.
When I’m in conflict, I bring all kinds of emotions and misconceptions to the table. My responsibility is to ask God to point out my own shortcomings, not the shortcomings of others. I ask God to make it clear to me anything within me that is wrong and then allow Him to lead me on the path that is always right.
When I genuinely pray those verses from Psalm 139, God will show me the right way. He’ll not play games, and he’ll always forgive, even when he points out that part of the problem in the conflict is me.
As God reveals to me the sin in my life, I must take responsibility for it. And that may mean I need to bring it up in conversation with the other person. It always means I get right with God. My job is to admit any part of the conflict that was caused by my bias, insensitivity, immaturity, or negligence, or any other reason.
Jesus made this point Matthew 7:3-5, “And why worry about a speck in the eye of a brother when you have a board in your own? Should you say, ‘Friend, let me help you get that speck out of your eye,’ when you can’t even see because of the board in your own? Hypocrite! First get rid of the board. Then you can see to help your brother” (TLB).
Pointing the finger will never resolve conflict. I must first look at myself and ask God for wisdom to recognize my sin and take responsibility for it. It will never be easy, but it will always be the right choice.
In summary, ask God to search me and know my heart, even test me and my thoughts. Allow him to point out any offensive way in me. How am I to recognize sin unless I let God point it out. Then, when God shows me, I can repent of it and be forgiven. One of the best strategies for de-escalating conflict is asking God to give and provide me a clear picture of myself. I need to ask God to point out my own shortcomings, not the shortcomings of others.Even when he points out that part of the problem in the conflict is me, He’ll always forgive. As God reveals sin in my life, I must take responsibility for it and get right with God. Pointing the finger will never resolve it. I must first look at myself and ask God for wisdom to recognize my sin and then take responsibility for it. It will never be easy, but it will always be the right choice.
When it comes to my interactions with Senior Leadership I find myself in conflict. Father, I ask you to search my thoughts and help point out what I need to confess. I pray with the help of the Holy Spirit that I can contemplate and hear clearly from you my part of the conflict. I ask you also for wisdom and guidance for my day, my work, my leadership and my interactions with others. Help steer me to do what is right. I pray these things through your Son Jesus’ name, amen.
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