Using Words To Benefit Others

In summary of Ephesians 4:28-29 it says, "Watch the way you talk; don’t be foul, dirty, abusive, unwholesome or harmful in what you say.  Let everything be good and helpful, building up according to, or saying what they need.  They should be words that help them to be stronger or be of an encouragement / benefit to them.  Make each word a gift."

Bottom Line:
We need to watch the way we talk to others, especially in how we provide correction..  Don’t be foul, dirty (or unwholesome), abusive or harmful in what you say.  Instead, let your words be good and helpful, ones that will build them up, saying what they really need.  Your words should be help them be stronger.  Let them provide encouragement.  Be of a benefit to them.  

What this means to me:
God wants me to use what I say to others to be a benefit to them.  My words need to be full of grace and be helpful.  They need to be ones that will build up instead of tear down.  Unfortunately in times of anger or disappointment, or even if I’m trying to make myself look better, what comes naturally are selfish harsh words that tend to tear down.  If I can learn and remember to correct others in a loving way it can really make a positive difference in their lives.  If I do this the way God wants me to it will build that person up, If I don’t do this correctly it will just tear them down.  The biggest thing for me to watch out for is my attitude.  If my focus is on only pointing out faults or respond out of anger or hurt then before speaking I need to stop myself and ask what my motive is in this interaction.  Am I correcting them for my benefit (ego) or for theirs.  I need to proceed by with correction by first affirming the person and their worth, letting them know their value, then presenting the behavior that needs some adjusting in a kind way (adding in what impact they are having with their behavior to others or to the group.)   I really need to keep this in mind as I am completing my mid-year reviews with my team this coming week.  When I come across behaviors I feel need correction, I should stop and ask God for guidance.  After consulting with him on the situation and my attitude I can then proceed in way that will help them out.